Protecting Alone
by Litanya
Summary: Tai believes that he is alone in the world... and he has a secret. Can the others help him before he does anything too terrible? Eventually Taiora, Takari and Mimoe FINISHED
1. Default Chapter

Author's Note: I do not own digimon or the song "Innocent Eyes" by Delta Goodram. Please don't sue me. This is a one shot, I think and series 2 hasn't happened, this is set after series 1, and all other series are irrelevant. Enjoy!  
  
Words written like this *.* are the lyrics to the song.  
  
Protecting Alone  
  
*Do you remember? When you were seven And the only thing that you wanted to do Was to show your mum that you could play the piano.*  
  
Tai sighed as he remembered back to when he and his little sister were younger and their family was still together. Then he had been happy, and he missed those days of happiness readily.  
  
*Ten years have passed And only one thing lasts And that's the song that we played alone That made my mama cry.*  
  
Ten years hadn't passed since Tai was seven, but the eight years that had passed felt like eternity. After coming back from the digital world when he was eleven years old, it had only been a year before his parents had split up. Kari had been sent off to live with their father, whilst Tai was left to live with their mother. Just thinking about the good, happy days of the past made Tai want to cry.  
  
*I miss those days I miss those ways When I got lost in fantasies In a cartoon land of mysteries In a place you won't grow old In a place you won't feel cold.*  
  
Tai was now fifteen years old, and all he wanted to do was to go back to being ten again, where he would have no idea of all of the troubles that he would come across. Hikari, his sister whom he loved, was now eleven years old. She had taken the divorce better than her brother had, but she had a good reason to. Both of their parents loved Kari.  
  
*And I'll say I seem lost in my reflection. Find the stars fall in my direction. For the little girl inside Who won't, just hide Don't let me see mistakes and lies Let me keep my faith and innocent eyes.*  
  
Kari. he would do all that he could to protect her, he would do anything. Even keep this secret. He had managed to keep it a secret from everybody for three years; everybody still believed that he was still the same happy boy who had been their leader in the digital world. But he wasn't, he was different. He still wore the same cheeky grin, but to him it had no meaning. But he would keep grinning just to keep Kari safe, to make sure that she wouldn't have to find out.  
  
*Do you remember? When you were fifteen The kids at school called you a fool 'Cause you took the chance to dream.*  
  
Everybody believed his charade, even Sora, his best friend from when he was about three years old. Of course, Sora was too busy staring into Matt's eyes nowadays to even know that Tai existed, and that hurt. Tai had fallen in love with his childhood best friend before they had gone to the digital world, and to know that she loved his rival was painful, but he still remained in contact with them and stayed best friends with both Matt and Sora. That wasn't his main problem though, as much as that hurt him. Something else that was happening to him was much worse.  
  
*And in the times that's passed Only one thing lasts And that's the same old song that we played alone And made my daddy cry.*  
  
Tai wished that he could have been the one to live with their father, wished that he could go back in time and change it. For his mother only wanted to live with Kari. If anything went wrong, his mother would blame it on him and say, "If Kari was here then this wouldn't have happened! Why did I end up with you? You're not perfect like my dear little Hikari."  
  
*I miss those days I miss those ways When I got lost in fantasies In a cartoon land of mysteries In a place you won't grow old In a place you won't feel cold.*  
  
Hikari. How could Tai love her as much, as well as hate her? He loved her as any brother loved their younger sibling, but he hated her just as much. Why did she have to be so perfect? Didn't she know that she was making his life hell because of her perfection?  
  
"I seem lost in my reflection Find a star fall in my direction For the little girl inside Who won't, just hide Don't let me see mistakes and lies Let me keep my faith and innocent eyes.*  
  
But still. he couldn't let her know. He had to protect her, she needed her mother. He'd handled it for three years; couldn't he handle it for more until he moved out? But before he had had his friends to distract him, even though they didn't know that they were the ones keeping the smile on his face.  
  
*I'm gonna feel things under the skin Under the thoughts of within Learning the subtext of the mind See creation, power divine  
  
My innocent eyes.*  
  
Why did his mother have to always attack him? She didn't use physical attacks most of the time, the kind of attacks that Tai could handle, but she took him down mentally. She knew exactly the right words to say to make him upset, and she used them every night. She hit him more than a few times each day too, and that hurt, but nothing hurt him more than the fact that his mother didn't love him because he wasn't Kari. And that one thing made him hate Kari and love her at the same time. And of course the physical pain didn't help the situation. Sometimes he wished that he could tell someone what was going on, but then that would mean that his mother would be taken away and Kari would never be able to see her again. That would make Kari sad, and that was the last thing that Tai wanted to do, even though he hated her.  
  
*I miss those days I miss those ways When I got lost in fantasies In a cartoon land of mysteries In a place you won't grow old In a place you won't feel cold.*  
  
"Why do we have to grow up? Why can't I keep living the best ten years of my life over and over again?" he asked himself quietly, staring out the window. He was at home and he knew that soon his mother would come home. Then it would start all over again. He prayed that his mother had had an excellent day and that she would have nothing to blame on him, but that only happened once every blue moon. He would even get blamed if there was a traffic jam on the way to work. He heard the door slam shut and Tai knew that his prayers weren't answered. It seemed that even God was against him.  
  
"I seem lost in my reflection Find a star fall in my direction For the little girl inside Who won't, just hide Don't let me see mistakes and lies Let me keep my faith and innocent eyes Faith and innocent eyes Faith and Innocent eyes Faith and innocent eyes.*  
  
An hour later Tai was lying on his bed, trying to ignore the pain in his chest. His mother had had a very bad day, and had taken it upon herself to make sure that Tai's was a living hell too. She had pushed him against the wall and punched him in the chest, insulting him in her low, calm voice, for about an hour until she felt that he was feeling worse than her. She hadn't even hurt her hands, as she had been wearing boxing gloves. The gloves didn't stop the punches from hurting though, and Tai felt like he had broken a few ribs.  
  
*For the little girl inside Who won't, just hide Don't let me see mistakes and lies Let me keep my faith and innocent eyes.*  
  
"I've got to keep this to myself for Kari. It's not her fault that she's perfect and mum likes her better. Kari almost worships mum, so I can't spoil her dreams. But I can't keep on acting happy all of the time, it's just too hard. Maybe I should just act quieter around people, then maybe it'll be easier to handle. I can't break Kari's trust. Even if it kills me, I won't hurt Kari. And he fell asleep, repeating that thought over an over in his mind, 'I won't hurt Kari.'  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Sora walked quietly up to Matt and covered his eyes from behind.  
  
"Guess who?" she asked with a smile, knowing that he would pretend that he didn't know. He had been talking with Tai, who had a small smile on his face instead of his usual grin. 'Hmm. maybe Tai's beginning to grow up. He doesn't have that goofy grin on his face, but he still seems happy enough. He is growing up.'  
  
"I couldn't possibly guess. Could it be that new girl in my maths class? Or could it be Sora?" Matt turned around and greeted Sora with their usual morning kiss. Tai just coughed and smiled cheekily.  
  
"I'll leave you two lovebirds here. I've got to go to the library. See you two later, that is, if you don't die of lack of oxygen!" and he left laughing, but that was the complete opposite of what he felt inside. He wanted to cry, but forced himself to act happy. After all, he was known as the guy who was always cheerful, and he couldn't lose his reputation.  
  
After they had broken off their kiss they sat down on the bench that was next to where they were standing.  
  
"Is it me or is Tai different today? He wasn't as cheerful as he usually is," Matt commented as he watched their friend walk away, "he seemed more. normal and un-Tai like."  
  
"Yeah, I noticed that too. It's almost like he's finally beginning to grow up. All I can say is that it's about time!" Sora too was watching her childhood best friend walk away, "but didn't he say that he was going to the library? He just walked passed it!"  
  
"Maybe he just wanted to leave us alone. He probably went looking for someone else to bother," Matt told her, taking her hand in his, "after all, we are basically immune to his teasing now."  
  
"You're right. Anyway, isn't it a good thing that we have got a bit of privacy at the moment?" Sora asked, turning to him.  
  
"Yep, I guess you're right," and they leant into each other a kissed again, forgetting all about Tai and just concentrating on each other.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Tai didn't bother to go and find anybody else; he knew that it would just be the same. Joe and Mimi were going out, as were T.K and Kari. Even Izzy had a girlfriend, who was also a computer freak. Even if Tai went up and talked to any of the others, they would just be like Sora and Matt. And Tai knew that he wouldn't be noticed, so he just didn't bother trying to find his friends. He wandered around the school grounds, occasionally glimpsing his friends walking around, but he took special care to avoid Sora and Matt, the only two except Kari who would notice he was there. And he had told them he was going to the library. He walked around by himself until the bell rang, telling the students that they had better get their books quickly and go to their classes. Tai went to his locker and got out his maths books, dreading going to his class. Both Sora and Matt were in his class, and he had no choice but to watch their constant flirting in class. He had to sit behind them as the teacher had allocated seats, and so he could see everything they did. That's why he hated maths so much.  
  
"Hey Tai! You ready for maths?" Sora asked happily. Maths was one of her favourite subjects because she got to sit with Matt. Tai just smiled his small smile, and nodded.  
  
"You bet! It's my favourite class," he told her sarcastically. Matt just rolled his eyes and grabbed Sora's arm.  
  
"Come on guys, we'd better not be late. You know how Mrs. Moron gets if anybody's late to class. It's like she turns into a dragon or something," Matt emphasized the class's nickname for their teacher. Her name was actually Mrs. Moran, but they called her Mrs. Moron.  
  
"You guys go on ahead, I forgot my homework," Tai lied, needing an excuse to get away from them. His ribs were still hurting from the night before and he needed to stop to try to make them stop hurting. They had been hurting all morning, and it had taken an effort to get out of bed, never mind ignoring the flirting going on between the two of them.  
  
"Tai, your homework is right there," Sora pointed to a piece of paper hanging out from underneath his folder. Tai cursed himself inwardly, but it didn't show on his face.  
  
"So it is, so it is. Well, let's go then!" and they walked to maths, with Matt and Sora leading the conversation whilst Tai just stared ahead, not paying much attention to the conversation. He was trying too hard to ignore the pain in his chest to notice what they were talking about.  
  
"Um. Tai? Earth to Tai! We asked you a question," Matt was a bit impatient with his best friend. It was the fifth time they had asked the question, and he still hadn't responded.  
  
"Um. sorry, I wasn't really listening. What was it again?" Tai pulled himself away from that other planet he was on and listened to what they were saying.  
  
"We asked if you were okay, you looked a little spaced out there for a moment," Sora told him, a little worried. He was acting a bit too serious, like something was wrong and she didn't like it.  
  
"Well, it's my mother's birthday soon and I was wondering what I was going to get her. Sorry, my mind was wandering," Tai replied as they walked into their classroom. Tai was glad that he had been able to think that up quickly, and Sora felt the worry wash out of her.  
  
'He was just thinking Sora, he's fine. It is his mother's birthday soon, and from what I remember Tai always found it hard to find something for her. Kari would always find something easily, but Tai would always take a while, and he would work hard to get her a good present.  
  
"Why don't you ask Kari? She always has good ideas," she suggested. She missed the look of pain in Tai's eyes when she said that, but he seemed to smile even more at her.  
  
"That's a good idea Sora. I'll ask Kari later," Tai couldn't believe that Sora had said that. It seemed that now even Sora was comparing him to Kari's perfection. He hated it. They walked to their seats and Tai sat next to Mimi, who was also in his maths class. She ignored him as usual, talking to one of her best friends. Sora was Mimi's best digidestined friend, but Mimi had an even closer friend called Alison, which was whom she was talking to now. Tai just opened his folder and sat staring into space until Mrs. Moron came into the room. Even then Tai couldn't pay attention. Every breath he took made his chest feel on fire and Sora and Matt were flirting in front of him. To make matters worse, Mrs. Moron decided that she was going to pick on him.  
  
"Taichi Kamiya, come and right the answer to this question up on the board," Tai groaned in his mind and got up, trying to make it so he didn't hit his chest, but not succeeding. He took the marker out of Mrs. Moron's hand and looked at the question. On the board were the words  
  
Factorise: x3-x2-16x+16 when x-1 is a factor  
  
Tai had no idea what to do, and he was starting to see spots in front of his eyes from all the pain that was going through his chest. He looked up and saw another example and quickly saw how it was done. After all, he may not like maths, but he was good at it. He quickly went through the process on the board. He answered it quickly for once, and this surprised many, including the maths teacher and Tai's friends. He had always made it look like he struggled with maths, and now he had solved a problem quickly when he obviously hadn't been paying attention! The whole class was amazed.  
  
"Yeah, that's the answer. You may go back to your seat now," Mrs. Moron told Tai, still amazed.  
  
"Can I go and see the nurse? I have a bit of a headache," Tai asked, anxious to get out of the classroom. Mrs. Moron was even more surprised. He had done that with a headache too? She nodded.  
  
"Yeah, here, I'll get you a slip," As soon as Tai was outside the room he leant back against the wall next to the door and sighed. The day was not going well for him that was for sure.  
  
'It's too hard to even attempt to act happy today. My ribs hurt too much, but what can I do? I'll just act really quiet today and blame it on a headache. Maybe it'll be better tomorrow," he sighed and made his way to the nurse's office. He had to go after all, as he had to get the nurse to sign it. And maybe a panadol would help the pain. When he returned to class he went back to his seat and started to daydream again, still wishing that he was ten again and could relive all of the happy times instead of being stuck in the present. He was so deep into his thoughts that he forgot about the pain in his chest and he didn't hear the bell ring.  
  
"Tai? The bell's gone, it is recess. Earth to Tai! Snap out of your thoughts and return back to Earth!" Matt was getting extremely impatient with his friend. Something just wasn't right with him, but trying to get anything out of Tai was like trying to pull a deeply rooted tooth out of your own mouth.  
  
"Hmm? Oh, sorry, I guess I was a little zoned out there. I'm coming," Tai packed up all of his books and stood, ready to go. He almost gasped in pain as he stood up, but he didn't. Sora and Matt exchanged glances as they saw that Tai's ever present smile had disappeared.  
  
"Tai, are you all right? You seem a little out of it today," Sora commented, hoping that there was a stupid reason for Tai's un-Tai like behavior. She didn't like seeing her childhood best friend acting so weirdly. She wanted to make sure that it was only something stupid.  
  
"Yeah, I'm fine. I have a headache, that's all," he smiled at her, and she felt reassured. He was only acting weirdly because he had a headache. Nothing more. She relaxed again and she and Matt resumed their conversation that they had been having. Mimi and Alison trotted behind them, talking at a mile a minute. Tai stopped when they reached his locker, and the others didn't even stop their conversations. They just walked on, ignoring him. Their lockers were on the other side of the locker bay, so that was why they hadn't stopped. Tai almost threw his books into his locker and walked out to the oval, where there was a group of trees. Deciding that he wanted to be alone, he quickly climbed into the top branches of one of the trees there and sat hidden amongst the leaves. From where he was, he could see anyone that came near. This was where the digidestined usually met when they all had lunch or recess.  
  
"And then dad and I went out for ice cream! It was the best night ever!" Tai heard the last part of Kari and T.K's conversation. It was Kari who had been speaking and Tai felt a big shot of jealousy run through him. She had had fun eating ice cream with their father whilst he was being beaten by their mother. How was that fair? It wasn't, but Tai knew that he had to live with it, or tell someone about his mother. He didn't want to have to do that, so he would have to live in pain and sadness whilst Kari lived happily without a care.  
  
"Sounds cool! My mother took me out for ice cream too last night, and we went and saw a movie. It seems that last night was a good night for everybody," T.K. said happily, Kari's hand held tightly in his. Tai closed his eyes, trying to ignore the pain in his chest whilst he tried not to cry. Doing both at the same time was hard, and he only succeeded in not crying. As the others arrived he knew that he wouldn't be able to stay in the tree for much longer. He doubted that they would worry about him, but as he had been acting weirdly, they might worry.  
  
"Where's Tai?" he heard Matt and Sora ask as they arrived at the tree. Everyone else looked around.  
  
"I don't know. I forgot that he wasn't here," Kari admitted, making Tai even angrier at her. She hadn't even realized that he was missing from the group and she had had a good night the night before. He sighed to himself, and realized that he was going to have to get down from the tree. He climbed down a few branches until he was in sight of the others.  
  
"I'm here, no need to worry," he smiled his trademark smile, even though his chest was hurting even more, "See?" The others just muttered something and then turned to their boyfriends or girlfriends. It was annoying, but Tai just ignored everyone and sat daydreaming. It was then that he remembered what his mother was going to make him do. He distinctly remembered her telling him that he had to quit soccer.  
  
~FLASHBACK~  
  
In the middle of her little punching fit Tai's mother slowly smiled.  
  
"I know what. You are going to quit soccer tomorrow. If you don't, I'll spread rumors around your school about you. And they will be believable rumors. I need you to stay home and make sure that dinner is cooked for me when I get home. It's not like you enjoy soccer anyway, you just want to be lazy." Tai had had a sinking feeling in his stomach. Soccer was one of the few things that made Tai's life livable. Now he was going to have to give it up.  
  
~END OF FLASHBACK~  
  
Tai looked at his watch. He still had 10 minutes left of recess, enough time for him to tell the coach the bad news. He climbed down from the tree and left the group, who didn't even notice that he was leaving. He had to tell the coach the bad news when he was alone, so the others didn't notice that he had quit soccer. He told his coach, who looked disappointed.  
  
"But Tai, the tournament is coming up and we need you to play. You're the best on the team!" the coach protested. Tai just looked at the ground.  
  
"I'm sorry coach, but I have to quit. I don't like soccer anymore, and I have to work. I'm sorry," Tai didn't look up while he said that, but the coach believed him, although not very much.  
  
"Well, I suppose that the only reason to play is if you enjoy it. Enjoy your job Tai, and good luck."  
  
"Thanks coach. Good luck at the tournament!" Tai turned and walked away, his heart down in his stomach. His mother was taking away everything that he enjoyed in life, until all he had left were his friends. And they obviously didn't care. The bell rang and Tai sighed. Another two hours of classes, with his friends ignoring him everywhere.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Somehow, he didn't know how, but Tai made it through the day without too much trouble, although he was pretty much ignored the whole time. As he walked to the school gates, he passed Sora.  
  
"Hey Tai, ready for soccer?" when she saw that he was still in his school uniform she frowned, "Come on, we're going to be late if you don't hurry." Tai just sighed and turned to face her.  
  
"I-I've quit the team. I'm not playing anymore," he said quickly, staring at the ground at his feet. Sora had expected any answer but the one she got.  
  
"What? Why? You love soccer! Why would you quit? We need you for the tournament!" Sora was angry at him, but she was angrier at herself. Why hadn't she seen that Tai was not enjoying soccer? What was wrong with him?  
  
"I don't like soccer anymore. And you're a better player than I am Sora, so I'm sure the team will win. Anyway, I've got to go. See you tomorrow," Tai turned around and quickly left, leaving Sora just staring after him. Matt came up behind Sora and gave her a hug.  
  
"What's wrong Sora? You look pretty shocked," Matt commented, seeing that Sora was still staring after Tai, who had disappeared.  
  
"I never thought I'd see the day that Tai would quit soccer," Sora told him, still in shock.  
  
"Tai quit soccer? That's almost like saying that the sky is purple!" Matt exclaimed, "What's wrong with him? It's almost like he is a different person today!"  
  
"I don't know! His reason for quitting was that he didn't like it anymore, which is about as easy to believe as to believe that I hate soccer! And he left just before a tournament. Tai would usually play in the tournament before he quit, just so he wouldn't let the team down. I don't know what's come over him," Sora was now definitely worried about her friend. Tai would never act like that usually, and that worried Sora.  
  
"I'll get Kari to talk to him. You'd better go to soccer," Sora nodded reluctantly and Matt went off to find his little brother and his girlfriend. He finally spotted them at the gate, about to part.  
  
"Hey, T.K, Kari, wait up!" the eleven year olds stopped and turned to look at Matt.  
  
"Hey Matt, what's up?" Kari asked him, looking at him curiously. Matt had run up to them, so he stopped for a second to get his breath back before he straightened.  
  
"Can you go talk to Tai Kari? He's quit soccer and we're really worried about him. He's been acting a bit weird lately," Matt went straight to the point. He didn't like seeing one of his best friends acting strangely, and he had a feeling that it was serious. Kari's eyes went wide at Matt's words.  
  
"Tai, my brother Tai, quit soccer? Has the world ended or something?" Kari was worried about her brother. Tai would never ever quit soccer, not unless he was forced to, "Why'd he quit?"  
  
"Sora told me that Tai said that he didn't like it anymore. We don't believe that story of course," Matt saw the worry in Kari's eyes and knew that she would try her best to help Tai with whatever was going on, "Anyway, I have to go to my band practice. Good luck!" And with that Matt was off as he was running late.  
  
"Sorry T.K, but I got to go see what's wrong with my brother. I'll call you later, k?" Kari gave T.K a quick kiss on the cheek.  
  
"All right, I'll talk to you later. Good luck with Tai!" T.K. called as Kari hurried away. He hoped that she could figure out what was wrong with their former leader, they needed him too much.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Tai walked home quickly, knowing what he had to do. All of the pressure was getting too much for him. First his ribs, then all of the pressure of being ignored, and now he had had to quit soccer. He just wanted all of it to end. He put his bag down and took a knife from the kitchen, before he disappeared into his room and lay on his bed.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
When Kari arrived at her mother's apartment, she knocked on the door.  
  
"Tai, are you there? It's me, Kari," there was no answer. One of Tai's neighbors was just going out and he stopped.  
  
"I saw Tai go in there about 20 minutes ago. He didn't exactly look very well. I don't really know why, but he's been pretty upset lately. I mean, he's been upset ever since he and your mother moved here. Anyway, see you later Kari," he told her as he walked past, and Kari nodded.  
  
'If Tai got home 20 minutes ago, then why isn't he answering?' Kari wondered as she hunted through her school bag for the keys to the apartment, 'normally he'd be jumping to let me in.' She remembered when they were younger and Tai would come home after soccer practice. He would barely have knocked on the door before she would have opened it for him, and he had always done the same for her. She knew that something wasn't right and she rushed to find her keys. She finally opened the door and walked into the apartment.  
  
"Tai? It's me, Kari. Where are you?" she now knew that something was wrong, knew that Tai was hurt or something bad like that had happened. There was still no answer and Kari went around the apartment, strategically opening doors. She had no idea of how to get around as she didn't get to spend much time there. She opened the door to what looked to be Tai's bedroom. Tai was lying on his bed, but something was wrong. He was extremely pale and she could see a knife covered in blood on the floor.  
  
"Tai, it's me, Kari. Are you okay?" she got no answer and she felt sick as she realized what was wrong with him. He had slit his wrists. She backed away in horror, her mind in shock. She reached for the cordless phone that was on the table beside Tai's bed and called for an ambulance, her mind still numb. She followed the instructions that the ambulance people gave her and stood numbly once she had completed it all. The ambulance people came and put him on a stretcher.  
  
"Are you related to him?" a kind ambulance officer asked, seeing that Kari was in shock.  
  
"I-I'm his sister," she was still in shock and she had to struggle to answer. Why would he try to kill himself? He always seemed to be happy, so what made him want to pull a stunt like this? Why? That was the only question that was going around in Kari's head, and she started to cry silently as she tried to work the answer out.  
  
"You can come with him to the hospital. You can phone you parents when you get there. Come on," the officer lead her to the ambulance and she sat next to Tai, holding his hand and crying silently.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
When they arrived at the hospital Tai was taken to a room whilst Kari called her parents. Tai was still unconscious when they arrived at the hospital, and Kari was in tears. She wasn't allowed to see him as the hospital staff was worried about his condition. So she sat alone in the waiting room as her parents talked with the doctors, who were trying to find out why Tai would do a thing like that. She decided to take a walk outside, and she left. It was raining, which suited her mood perfectly. She walked through the park, not caring how wet she got. She had turned her mobile on once she left; just to make sure her parents could contact her if Tai woke. She sat down on one of the soaking wet swings and started to slowly swing herself. She could never get very high, not unless she had Tai pushing her. She was lost in memories when her mobile rang. She was startled out of her daze and reached for her phone.  
  
"Hello?"  
  
"Hi Kari, it's Sora. I was wondering if you'd spoken to Tai," Sora was a bit startled as Kari began to cry over the other end of the phone, "What's wrong Kari?"  
  
"I went over to Tai's to talk to him and when I got there, nobody answered. I used my key to get inside and-and T-Tai, h-he had sl-slit h-his wrists," Kari sobbed out, making Sora sit up straight. Matt, who was with her, just stared at her worriedly.  
  
"What? Please say that you're joking," Sora's heart was beating hard in her chest as she realized that Kari was not joking, "But why?"  
  
"I-I don't know! He never said anything and he always seemed to be happy and. he was still unconscious when I last saw him. He had been like that for about 20 minutes before I found him." Kari trailed off as she began to cry again, and Sora felt like she was going to cry too.  
  
"Look, where are you? Matt and I'll be there as soon as possible," Matt was looking confused as he didn't know what was going on, but he got up and got their coats and mobiles. Sora nodded, concentrating on what ari was saying.  
  
"I'm in the park next to Odaiba Hospital. I couldn't see him and I was going crazy in there," Kari tried to control her tears, but couldn't, "I'll see you guys then."  
  
"Yeah, see you in a few minutes," and Sora hung up, and quickly turned to Matt.  
  
"We have to get to the park next to Odaiba Hospital. Tai tried to kill himself," Sora explained as she grabbed her coat off Matt. He just stared at her.  
  
"Why?" was the only word that left his lips, the only question that Sora couldn't answer.  
  
"I don't know," she replied as it started to sink in and she started to cry silently, "but we've got to find out why."  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
When Tai regained consciousness he found that he was in hospital and his mother was sitting in the chair next to his bed.  
  
'Darn it! I can't even escape by death. Why do I have to be tormented like this?' Tai thought to himself as his mother noticed that he was awake.  
  
"Tai, you're awake! I'm so glad! Thank God you are still alive!" she exclaimed; not noticing the hatred that flashed across his face. Tai didn't answer; he just stared straight ahead with an expressionless face.  
  
"Tai, you okay?" his father's voice asked him, but again Tai didn't answer. He just stared straight ahead. So that was why his mother had sounded so nice and sincere, because there was a witness.  
  
'Trust dad to care when I'm in hospital. I mean, it took a drastic action like this to get attention. Not that I want attention, I just wanted to be rid of all of my troubles. Now it looks like I'll be getting more,' he thought to himself, never moving his gaze off the wall ahead of him.  
  
"Tai, are you okay?" his father repeated the question, but Tai again refused to answer. His father only sighed, "Fine then, have it your way and don't speak to anyone. We only want to help you Tai." His father seemed to be stressed, probably because of Tai.  
  
"Yes Tai, we're only here to help. We can't exactly help you until you tell us what's wrong though honey," Tai wanted to throw up. His mother was using her sugary voice, so it would seem like she cared. He didn't move, but he wished that he could tell her to stop pretending that she cared so much, but he couldn't hurt Kari. She was basically the only person who almost cared for him, but she would be better off if he was dead.  
  
"Kari was so shocked when she found you lying on your bed. Apparently Matt had told her that he and Sora were worried about you, something about you quitting soccer, so she went to see if you were okay. First you quit soccer, and now this? The doctor also said that you had three broken ribs. What's going on?" Tai was shocked to hear that Kari had found him, and he felt a little guilty, but he still would not say anything. Kari was happy at the moment and he had to make sure that she stayed that way.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
When Sora and Matt reached the park where Kari was still sitting on the swing, it was only 10 minutes after the call. Sora went straight to Kari and gave her a hug, to try and get Kari to cheer up a bit. She herself was struggling to not cry, after stopping her tears from falling on the way.  
  
"Hey Kari, you okay?" Sora asked, sitting on the swing next to her. Kari just nodded, unable to speak. Sora was about to say something when Kari's mobile went off again.  
  
"Hello?" Kari said, "Really? I'll be right there." Kari hung up the phone and wiped her eyes with her hands, "Tai just regained consciousness. I'm allowed to go see him. I don't know if you guys will be allowed to though."  
  
"That's okay Kari. We'll come with you and make sure that you're okay," Matt told the distraught girl, "after all, we don't want any other bad things to happen today." Kari bowed her head in thanks and the trio set off for the hospital, to go and see Tai.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Kari walked into the room where Tai was being kept and saw her parents on either side of his bed. Tai himself was just staring up at the top of the wall that was straight ahead of him, he didn't even seem to know that she had entered.  
  
"Kari," her father said, "maybe you can get him to tell you something, he hasn't spoken a word to either of us. We'll leave the two of you alone." And after that little speech both of her parents went to wait outside, her mother seeming to be a bit tense.  
  
"Hey Tai," Kari walked over and sat in the chair nest to his bed, "how are you feeling?" Tai didn't answer and his face didn't change at all, "Okay, so maybe you aren't feeling too good. Tai, why'd you do that? I look up to you, you are the best brother a girl could ever have and you and T.K are the most important people in my life. I care about you even more than our parents because you were always there for me. If anything happened to you I don't know what I'd do, and here you are trying to kill yourself! Why didn't you tell me?" With that Kari broke down again and started to cry. Tai was torn over what to do. Should he tell her what had been happening to him? Would she understand?  
  
"Please don't cry Kari. You know that I hate it when you do," Tai's voice was quiet and Kari almost couldn't hear him over her own sobs, "It wasn't your fault."  
  
"But it is my fault! I haven't been paying attention to you because I've been so caught up in my own life! If I would've stopped and taken the time to watch you to see if you were okay, then you wouldn't be here!" Kari managed to stop crying for her brother, but she was still going to argue, "Now, tell me why you did what you did, and why you quit soccer. I'm sure that that has something to do with it." Tai sighed.  
  
"I quit soccer because." Tai closed his eyes, as if remembering a painful memory, "Because mum made me." Whatever answers Kari had been expecting that was not one of them.  
  
"What? What do you mean?" Kari squealed loudly, causing Tai to glance outside the room to where their parents were sitting.  
  
"Not so loud please Kari. Ever since our parents split up and I was sent to live with mum she's been. she. she's been abusing me. I have three broken ribs at the minute, she did that last night. She threatens me by telling me that she'd spread rumors about me around the school. But that's not why I didn't tell on her. I didn't want to hurt you. You look up to mum and. well, I don't know. I guess I was just stupid," Tai didn't look at his sister who was staring at him in shock.  
  
"What do you mean? What are we going to do?..."  
  
End of Chapter 1  
  
Well, that was supposed to be a one-shot, but it didn't work. I'll update soon, but it's 11pm here and I'm not really supposed to stay up much later. Anyway, please review and I'll update A.S.A.P!! Cya! 


	2. Learning

Author's Notes: This is the second installment of a one-shot meant to be. I do not own digimon; if I did Tai & Sora would have gotten together, instead of Sora and Matt. And Joe and Mimi would have got together too, but since I don't own it, it didn't happen.  
  
Protecting Alone  
  
Chapter 2: Learning  
  
"What do you mean? What are we going to do? Why do you keep on telling lies?" Tai had known that Kari wasn't going to believe him as soon as she had said that first word. It hurt that she didn't believe that he was telling the truth, but he accepted it. He had known that nobody was going to believe him. He had no witnesses as nobody had ever come over to his house whilst it was happening, and his mother had been perfect whenever Kari had been over. He just said nothing and continued to stare at the wall in front of him.  
  
"I can't believe that you would lie like that! And to think that I looked up to you!" Kari truly believed that Tai was lying to her, and she couldn't believe that he would do such a thing, "You just want to try and wriggle yourself out of trouble by telling lies and trying to convict an innocent person! How could you be so unfeeling?" She stormed out of the room, causing her parent and Matt and Sora jump. She was so annoyed at her brother for doing this to her that it never occurred to her that Tai was telling the truth. As far as she was concerned, he was a big liar. Once Kari had left the room, Tai struggled to hold back tears. The only person who had seemed to have faith in him, the person he had taken all of his mother's abuse for, had basically told him that she never wanted anything to do with him.  
  
'You knew that this would happen, that's a part of the reason that you never told her. Now you've just lost the only person who really cares. But you still have to soldier on, but at least now you don't have to act happy all of the time,' Tai's thoughts told him, and he knew they were right, 'Next time don't open your mouth. In fact, maybe it'll be better if you never speak at all. Then at least you won't make the same mistake again.' Tai nodded and continued to stare at the wall, wanting nothing other than to be two again.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
"Kari, did Tai tell you anything?" Mr. Kamiya asked his daughter as she stormed out of the room, a bit surprised at his daughter's sudden appearance.  
  
"All he did was tell a bunch of lies. I have no idea why he did that, he just made up things to try and make it seem like it wasn't his fault. I could tell that he wasn't telling the truth," Kari's voice was full of anger, mainly pointed at Tai, but a bit was aimed at herself. She did believe that Tai was lying, but a tiny voice in her head was telling her that Tai had never lied about anything to her. Sure, he had missed things out so she didn't know the whole story, and when she asked him if he was okay he had always answered that he was fine, but he had never told her a straight out lie. Kari chose to ignore that tiny voice and she flopped down in one of the plastic seats in between Sora and her father. She didn't notice the satisfaction that flickered on her mother's face, but Sora saw it and frowned. She shook her head a little and then looked at Mrs. Kamiya again. There was just the look of a sad mother on her face now. Sora sighed.  
  
'Now I'm imagining things. Great. Why would Mrs. Kamiya be happy that her son was in hospital after trying to kill himself, and then be glad that his sister told them that he had been lying anyway?' she mentally kicked herself. All of the time that Kari had been talking to Tai, Sora hadn't been able to stop memories of her childhood with Tai flooding her. She remembered the all of the times that Tai had helped her, when she fell over or just when she had been feeling sad. She couldn't help but question herself as she remembered everything they had gone through as friends.  
  
'Why couldn't I see that Tai was in trouble? He has always been there when I was in trouble, and now the only time that he really needs my help I ignored him. Something bad must have happened for him to want to kill himself. It must have been going on for a while too, and we never guessed. Now I know why Tai was chosen for the crest of courage. I mean, I know that committing suicide is cowardly, but it must have been a big problem,' Sora's thoughts kept on getting mixed up and wandering around in circles. She was jolted out of her thoughts by Mr. Kamiya talking to her.  
  
"Do you want to go in and see if you can get anything out of him Sora? You and Tai have been close friends since you were very little, so maybe he'll talk to you," Sora nodded and stood up, ready to try and help her friend. She only hoped that he would talk to her.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
"Tai?" Sora was uncertain about what to say as she walked into the room. Tai was just staring straight ahead, not even recognizing her presence. His wrists were bandaged firmly, and for that Sora was glad. She hated seeing her best friend like he was and she knew that she had to help him. It was going to be hard to do that when he hadn't even glanced at her once.  
  
"Tai, why did you do this to yourself? Surely your life isn't that bad," Sora knew that she shouldn't have said that, but all Tai did was turn his expressionless gaze onto her. He didn't say anything, and she knew that he wasn't going to. But his stare was freaking her out a bit.  
  
"What I mean is, you have all of your friends, Kari, and your parents. We all care about you and we all want to help you with whatever it is that's wrong," Sora thought she saw a look of incredulity flash in Tai's eyes, but it was gone before she could look harder. Tai had gotten too good at hiding his real emotions from everyone, "We all care, and we don't want anything to happen to you. You can trust us; we all just want to help you." Tai's face was still emotionless, and it was making Sora feel more than uncomfortable. Her heart was feeling funny in her chest and at that minute the only thing she wanted was for Tai to be okay. Nothing more. She sighed in her head and watched Tai for any reaction. None showed on his face, but inside he was having a major battle.  
  
'She's telling the truth! Just let me tell her about what has been going on, and she'll believe me!' Tai was saying to his brain, but it wasn't listening, 'She just wants you to believe that! She's Matt's girl, and Matt and herself are the only people she cares about! You know that, so stop arguing and keep quiet! This is the only way to get people to leave you alone!' So Tai kept silent and emotionless, which Sora couldn't stand anymore.  
  
"Fine then, just ignore me! I see that you don't really care about our friendship, as you can only think about yourself at the minute," Sora turned and left quietly, after saying her whispered words. She didn't see or hear Tai whisper after her, "I do care about others and that's what made this problem so big. I'm sorry Sora, I do care about our friendship, but you were the one that shattered it, the day you started ignoring me and paying all of your attention to Matt."  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
"Any luck?" Tai's father asked her hopefully as she came out of the room. She could only shake her head and Mr. Kamiya sighed.  
  
"Maybe I can talk to him. I'm his mother and I'm sure that he'll tell me something if I keep on asking him," Mrs. Kamiya looked determined about something, but for some reason Sora did not think that she was determined to get the answers out of Tai. Sora shook her head. Of course Mrs. Kamiya wanted to help Tai. Tai. he was so different from what he had been like when they were younger. It was almost as if something had possessed him over night. Sora considered the possibility for a second, but she quickly discarded it. She had known that something had been wrong with Tai for a while, but only deep down, so she hadn't consciously realized it. After all, she had known him basically all of her life, so of course she would know when he was acting strangely.  
  
"You okay Sora?" Matt asked as she flopped down in the same seat she had occupied before. Mrs. Kamiya went in to talk to Tai, and both Kari and Mr. Kamiya seemed deep in thought. Sora nodded glumly, her thoughts still on her best friend. Matt was worried about Sora, she seemed to be in a world of her own since she had seen Tai. He guessed that she was deeply concerned for her friend. Tai was his friend too, but he was also his rival. Matt preferred to keep what he was feeling a secret, and he was worried about his friend, but he couldn't help but feel that Tai didn't really want his help. They had sort of drifted apart since he had started going out with Sora. Matt sighed to himself and stood up.  
  
"I have to go Sora, but if anything happens, call me, okay?" Sora snapped out of her daze for a second and nodded.  
  
"Yeah, I will. I'll see you tomorrow," then she went back into her daze. Matt just nodded and headed back home, ready to cook for his father.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
As Mrs. Kamiya walked through the door, Tai wanted to run and jump out of the window. He couldn't, of course, but he really wanted to. He kept his face at his neutral expression and refused to look at her.  
  
"Tai, what do you think you were doing? You made Kari upset, and you're not going to get away with that!" she hissed angrily, and fiercely. She may have just whispered it, but Tai would have been able to hear her from the other side of the world. He didn't move, he didn't even blink as she sat back and pretended that they were having a deep and meaningful conversation, but Tai heard the hidden messages in her words. Basically, even though he had failed to do it himself, he was dead as soon as she could get him home. He sighed mentally and did the teenage thing of pretending to the lecture, but actually his attention could not have been further away. He was thinking about what he was going to do once he was out of the prison-like hospital room. The answer was that he couldn't really do anything but stay with his mother, and live a life full of misery. He hated the thought of it, but he knew that that was the only place he could go to. And nobody would believe his explanation anyway. He continued pretending to listen, his mind filled with negative thoughts.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
A few days later, and after a couple of hours with a psychiatrist in which he said nothing, Tai was finally able to get out of the hospital. He went to school as usual, but he was silent, a ghost of his old safe. All of his friends knew what he had tried to do, and they were amazed and upset at the change in their old leader. Even though none of them had spent much time with him lately, they still depended on him. To see him become a ghost of himself was depressing to say the least. He still hadn't said a word to anyone, and his life was back to as it was before, except that he wouldn't talk. His friends all seemed to take it upon themselves to try and get him back to his normal, cheerful self, but none of them were succeeding so far. They still met at the same place at lunchtime, but Tai was no longer there. Or so they thought. Unbeknownst to them, Tai always arrived first at the trees and climbed up into the top branches. He was curious as to what they thought was going on, as he wanted to know how far he could trust them these days. Not that he was planning on saying anything to anyone.  
  
"What the hell is going on with Tai? He's so. weird. I mean, he won't even talk to us, so what are the chances of us helping him? He doesn't even acknowledge our presence, never mind listen," Mimi seemed pretty upset, and she had a reason to be. They had just had maths, and Mimi had tried to get through to him. He had just kept his expressionless face on and kept on working. Since he had come back to school most of his teachers had been surprised because he had started to boost up his grades immediately. He was smart, and had always been so, but he had always found that talking to his friends was better than doing his work. Now he wasn't talking to anybody, he could concentrate on his work, and that was what he was doing. It was the only thing he could do, really. Mimi had spent the whole maths lesson trying and trying to get him to even acknowledge her presence, but he hadn't. He knew that it was better for everybody that he kept quiet, so keep quiet he did.  
  
"We don't know what's up with him, but whatever it is, it's not good. Tai is one of those people that others depend on, even if he doesn't know it. We need to find a way to help him, and soon," Izzy stated this, not even looking at his lap top, which was actually turned off for once. The others nodded in agreement, and Tai wanted to laugh. People didn't depend on him; they usually ignored him most of the time. Sure Sora, Matt and Kari sometimes paid attention to him, but even his little sister had forsaken him and called him a liar. She had had the most faith in him and if she called him a liar, he even began to doubt himself, never mind the others believing him.  
  
"If only he would tell us what was wrong, or even drop a hint," Joe cried out in frustration. Even his reliability had failed in trying to get Tai to talk, and that annoyed him a lot. He was extremely worried about his friend, and that also contributed to him being annoyed at Tai. Tai himself was looking in his pocket for some maths questions. He might as well kill two birds with one stone and do his maths homework while he listened. As he took the maths sheet out of his pocket, another piece of paper fell out, and the wind blew it out of his grasp. It spiraled around the trunk of the tree before moving away completely and floating away. Sora happened to notice the paper, but she didn't see where it came from.  
  
"I have a feeling that this piece of paper is important somehow," she said, pulling the piece of paper out of the air. The others looked at her as she read it, whilst Tai desperately tried to remember what he had written on that piece of paper. Sora paled a bit at what she read, but she recovered quickly. Ai realized that he would have to climb out of the tree to get back the paper before she read it out to the others, as much as he didn't want to reveal that he had been there all along.  
  
"What is it Sora? What does it say?" Matt asked his paling girlfriend, who looked like she was in shock at what she saw on the paper. Tai climbed down a few branches and jumped out of the tree on the other side to where the others were. He walked back around the tree and glanced at Sora and the others. They all stopped talking as they realized he was there, and Tai held out his hand for the piece of paper that Sora held. Sora glanced at it again, before she handed it back to him. As soon as he had the paper in his hand again, Tai walked away without saying a word.  
  
"What did that paper say? It was obviously Tai's paper, or he wouldn't have come and gotten it off you. What was on it?" T.K asked with one arm around Kari. They all looked at Sora, who was still pretty pale.  
  
"Uh. it was nothing really. Just some maths," Sora lied badly even when she wasn't shocked, so the others just stared at her as she played with her fingers.  
  
"We're not that dumb Sora. We can tell when it's something serious, and it is serious now. What are you hiding that was on that piece of paper of Tai's?" Kari started to look uncomfortable at T.K's question, and she looked at the ground. Matt noticed this and wondered what was wrong with the young girl.  
  
"What's wrong Kari?" everyone swapped their gaze from Sora to Kari at Matt's words. They all noticed her discomfort and they too wondered what had caused it.  
  
"I uh, I just remembered something that I have to do. I'll see you guys later," she managed to catch Sora's eye as she turned around and quickly escaped, managing to dodge her friends who were trying to find out why she had been so nervous. Sora quietly escaped the other way, whilst they were all distracted on stopping Kari. When they finally gave up on Kari, they turned back to ask Sora, only to find that she too had disappeared.  
  
"I give up with girls!" Matt and T.K both groaned as they realized that their girlfriends had beaten them this time.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
"Sora, what did that paper really say?" Kari panted as they met up after their escape from the others. Sora wasn't panting at all, but then the younger girl had had to run further. Sora hesitated a moment before she answered.  
  
"It looked like it was just something Tai scribbled down when he was bored in class or something. It read: I wish I could go back to being three years old again. Back when I was allowed to be happy. I had my family and my best friend, and. I had everything. Now. I don't want to even think about it. Kari doesn't believe me, and my mother. I don't want to see her ever again. My best friend, well, I basically don't even know her anymore, so what's the use of having a best friend? The rest of the digidestined have all found happiness, but I have lost all of mine. Why did Kari have to come and check on me on that particular day? It seems that everybody wants me to suffer. I guess I should just resign to my destiny and be depressed, as everything on Earth won't stop until I am." Sora couldn't believe that Tai no longer thought of her as a best friend, but as someone he hardly knew. She realized that they hadn't spent a lot of time together like they used to, and she didn't really know Tai very well anymore either. She turned to Kari, who seemed to be fighting a battle inside.  
  
"Kari, what is it that Tai told you that you didn't believe?" Sora knew that this was important, and she wanted to get it out of the young girl. Kari hesitated, still battling inside. She wanted to help her older brother, but what he had told her seemed so unbelievable, so unreal. A tiny fragment of her brain was telling her that it was true though, and although it was only a small voice, it still didn't help her. Kari opened her mouth to answer, but at that minute the bell rang loudly, and the two girls both sighed.  
  
"Look, I have soccer after school, and then I have to help my mum, so we'll continue this conversation tomorrow before school, okay?" Kari nodded in agreement before they both hurried off to their classes, where they were both questioned as to where they had been by their friends. Sora and Kari just ignored the questions though, but neither concentrated on their classes. They were both worrying about Tai.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
During English, the class that Tai had after lunch, he couldn't help but stop paying attention to the teacher. He had glanced at the paper which Sora had found once he had taken it off her, and he knew that now Sora was going to try and talk to him soon. And he wasn't looking forward to it. Why did she have to have found that piece of paper? He had felt upset during the maths class, and so he had written that on an old sheet of paper, after finishing the class work. Mimi hadn't noticed that he hadn't been doing maths anymore, and so she hadn't seen the paper. Tai wondered who Sora had told about what was on the paper. He desperately hoped that she hadn't told everyone, they would probably just try and get him to see a psychiatrist for depression or something.  
  
"Mr. Kamiya, are you still with us?" the teacher snapped. Tai just glanced up at Ms. Hayne, his teacher, with the same expressionless face that he wore every day, and she backed off and continued with the lesson, "Under Milk Wood by Dylan Thomas." Tai let his concentration wander again. Why did life have to be so hard? He settled down in his seat, his thoughts all negative.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
After school Sora went to soccer practice, but she found that she couldn't concentrate. Her thoughts kept on wandering to her 'best' friend. Soccer just wasn't the same without Tai to talk to and laugh with, and his negative attitude that had seemed to come up over night both frightened and worried her. She had no idea what Tai had told Kari, but she had a feeling that it was very bad. It had to be if Kari didn't believe him as she always looked up to her older brother, and she would usually believe anything that he told her. Usually. That was the key word. Sora tried to get her mind back onto soccer, but without her invincible team mate, she couldn't play as well as she would normally. The coach noticed this and pulled her over to talk.  
  
"Sora, you don't seem to be able to concentrate today. Is anything wrong?" he asked, concerned about the welfare of one of his star players. Sora shrugged, a bit uncomfortable.  
  
"I'm fine, it's just that Tai usually plays in attack with me and now that he isn't here, I don't know the moves of the new guy playing in attack. He keeps on surprising me, and so I can't play my game as well as I used to, that's all," she replied, and the coach nodded in agreement.  
  
"You know Tai pretty well, so do you know why he stopped playing? I don't believe a word that he said about 'not liking it anymore.' I know Tai and that kid almost lives for soccer. He wouldn't just stop liking it all of a sudden," the coach knew what Tai had tried to do, and he was no fool. Sora shook her head sadly.  
  
"I don't know why he quit. He's gone extremely quiet now; he won't even say a word after. you know. I know that he never stopped loving soccer though I don't know why. What are we going to do? The tournament is coming up in two weeks and I can't get the plays right unless I know how my fellow attackers play! I'm going to have to get Tai to come back. Do you mind if I skip practice today to try and convince Tai to come back? I'm sure that I can do it!" the coach thought for a second before nodding.  
  
"Yeah, after all, we need Tai to win the tournament, and it might snap him out of whatever is making him act so strangely. Good luck Sora!" but Sora was already on her way to the Kamiya's apartment, ready to find what was wrong with Tai.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * * Sora arrived at her friend's apartment, a bit out of breath. She leant her head on the door, to get her breath back, but she found that she could hear what was going on inside the apartment.  
  
"You're worthless Tai! All you bring is bad luck! If Kari was here instead of you, I would still have my job and we would all be happy. But no, I get stuck with you! You know that you are worthless, nobody cares about you anyway. I wish that you had succeeded in your mission before because at least then my bad luck would disappear," Sora backed away in shock at what she had heard coming from Mrs. Kamiya. She had also heard some things that sounded like slaps. Why was Mrs. Kamiya beating Tai? They had always been a happy family, at least all that Sora had seen. Tai had never shown any signs of abuse before, so what was going on? It sounded like a normal occurrence from what Sora could gather. She stumbled back home, wondering why Tai had never told anybody about the terrible abuse that he was put through.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
The next day at school Sora was still thinking about Tai. She didn't even bother to greet Matt properly; she didn't even notice that he had spoken to her. Matt was feeling uncomfortable because he wanted to break up with Sora and it wasn't helping that she was staring off into space.  
  
"Sora, I really need to talk with you," he repeated himself, and Sora finally seemed to notice what he was saying.  
  
"Hmm? Sorry Matt, my mind has been wandering a bit," Sora confessed, but she didn't want to tell Matt what she had found out right at that moment.  
  
"Well, I um. I think that we should break up," Matt told her quickly. He had discovered that he didn't have feelings for her when a new girl had moved to their maths class, and he had felt something deeper than what he felt for Sora. He realized that he just felt that Sora was like his sister, not like a girlfriend.  
  
"I agree. I mean, I just realized that I feel as if you are a brother, and I love you like a brother. It just took a while to sink in," Sora amazed herself by realizing that statement as she said it, and Matt looked relieved too.  
  
"Yeah, I love you like I would a sister. I'm glad you understand Sora," she just nodded in reply and stared off into space again, her thoughts again returning to Tai. She had seen him that morning, and he had had a black eye. Sora was sure that it had been given to him by his mother. Matt went and broke their news to the rest of the digidestined, who had already guessed that they would break up sometime soon. Especially as they saw Sora worry so much over Tai. Kari came up to Sora and tapped her on the shoulder.  
  
"You okay Sora? You seem a bit spaced out there," Kari said quietly, as to not startle Sora too much, "What's wrong?"  
  
"I went to talk to Tai last night, to try and convince him to rejoin the soccer team, but when I got there I was puffed, so I leant my head against the door to get my breath back, and I could hear what was going on in the apartment. It-it sounded so horrible! Your mother was saying all these bad things about Tai and- and I could hear a sound that was like a slap. Tai has a black eye today. I think that your mother is abusing him," Sora was surprised as Kari slowly nodded; taking in everything that Sora had said.  
  
"That was what Tai told me in the hospital. He told me that it had been going on ever since my family split up. I couldn't believe him when he told me. It was too hard to believe that my own mother would do something like that. But now that I know that it is true, I have to do something about it. What should we do?" That was one question that Sora did not know the answer to. But she was going to find it at all costs, to help Tai so that he wouldn't be alone.  
  
End of Chapter 2  
  
Well, there's the second chapter of my was-going-to-be-a-one-shot-but- didn't-make-it-fic. I hope you enjoy it! It was going to be put up earlier, but I got delayed in writing it because I had exams. Anyway, please R+R, and I'll update A.S.A.P! Please review!!! 


	3. Telling

Author's Note: I do not own Digimon because if I did then it would be a Taiora all of the way!!! Hope you enjoy part 3 of Protecting Alone!!!  
  
Protecting Alone  
  
Chapter 3: Telling  
  
Tai couldn't help but sigh as he reached school. He knew that people would stare at him because of his black eye. His mother had been fired from her job the day before and she had been home when he had gotten home from school. She had started to abuse him again, but it was ten times worse than normal, and so she had punched him in the face, bruising his eye. He could feel people's eyes on him, and he knew that people would be gossiping about how he got that black eye. He saw Sora and Matt talking and quickly averted his path. He had no intention of seeing his friends, but he caught Sora's eye for a second, before he quickly broke off the brief eye contact. He especially didn't want to see Sora out of all of his friends. She had been the one to hurt him the most, the one to break his heart. And she didn't even seem to regret it. Yes, that was the worst thing that had ever happened to him. He would put up with his mother's abuse for the rest of his teenage days if only Sora had picked him instead of Matt. But the past was the past and there was nothing he could do about it. He just changed his direction and went to his locker, ready to start another day of torture.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Sora and Kari sat in silence until the bell rang, and then they quietly went to their classes. Sora knew that she had to do something to help Tai, and quickly. She didn't want *anyone* especially her best friend, to be put to that torture everyday. Her first class that day was physics, a class that she shared with Tai. Izzy was also in their class, and Sora admitted that she had mainly talked to Izzy during the classes, so she could scam answers of him when she couldn't really be bothered working. She had thought that Tai wouldn't really know the answers as he fooled around in class, but since he had changed, he actually worked in class and his grades had shot up dramatically. It was as if he had been purposely fooling around in class, when he could easily do the work. It was kind of irritating.  
  
'Today I'm going to try talking to Tai in class. I'll tell him what I know and try to make him talk. I *have* to help him!' she muttered to herself, grabbing her physics books from her locker, 'After all, he would help me if I was in trouble.' She went straight to the classroom after roll call, knowing that Tai would be there. He was sitting outside the science lab, waiting for the teacher to come. His books were on the ground next to him and he was looking at the ground, probably trying to make his black eye invisible to everyone who was passing by.  
  
"Hey Tai," she said to him, smiling, even though she knew that she wasn't going to get a response out of him, "How are you? Wait, I know that you're not going to answer that." Tai didn't even look up at her words, and he seemed to be studying the floor. Sora threw her books to the ground and sat next to him, staring straight ahead. Nobody else was there yet, as their teacher was usually late and so nobody turned up until 10 minutes after the bell rung. Sora sighed to herself, trying to gather up the courage to say what she was going to say. It was funny how she had to gather up her courage, when she was sitting next to the digidestined of courage.  
  
"Tai, I know what is going on at your house, with your mother. I heard through the door yesterday. W-Why do you let that happen? And why didn't you tell anybody?" Tai continued to stare at the ground for a minute before he hopped up and grabbed his books.  
  
"You don't know anything. Just leave me alone," he said quietly, surprising her, "Stay out of my business." He walked away, going quite fast, and Sora knew that she had surprised him more than he had her. She just didn't understand why he had to run away from the help.  
  
'Maybe he's just afraid. He probably thinks that you're lying. After all, you haven't exactly been a great friend lately, and who knows what he has been through during the last few years, with no best friend to go to? You could have helped him you know, and then this mess would never have happened,' Sora sighed again, agreeing with the voice in her head. If only she had been a better friend. She stood up as people began arriving for the class, and smiled to Izzy, who was talking with Mel, his girlfriend. At the very least she would still be friends with the people who she *could* help.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Tai had been shocked at Sora's words, and he couldn't help but be angry at both her and at himself. He was angry at her because she had decided to pity him. She had never really shown him any attention until he had tried to kill himself, and he knew that she felt guilty. That was probably the only reason that she had talked to him again, the only reason that she pretended to care. How could she know what was going on? She had questioned him, making it seem as though he could do something about it and that he was stupid fr doing nothing. He could bet that nothing like that had ever happened to her. But then again, Sora never brought anybody bad luck. Not like him. What his mother said was true; he had caused his mother to have bad luck. If Kari had been with his mother, then it all wouldn't have happened and his mother would be happy. He might even have been happy, but no, the world was against him and so they made sure that Tai was always unhappy. He was doomed to unhappiness, and he knew it.  
  
He ran to his bag and stuffed his books in it, before he took off and left the school. There was no point in him being there, Sora would only ask questions and look down on him as if he were the stupidest person on the planet, whilst she talked and laughed about him with Matt. She had probably told Matt what a coward he was as he couldn't even stand up to his own mother. They probably laughed over it. Tai stopped running once he was out of the school and walked, knowing that he would attract attention by running in this crowd. He didn't have anywhere to go; he couldn't go home because his mother would be there and he couldn't go back to school because of Sora and Matt. Sora's tone hadn't really been mocking him, but he didn't want her to know, didn't want her to have to know that he couldn't even stand up to his own mother. He would stand up to her if it wasn't for Kari, but he had to protect her from their mother. If he had told anybody, then they would have taken her away, which would leave Kari devastated. After all, a girl looks up to their mother and respects them, and they *need* their mothers. Kari was no exception. So as Tai had nowhere to go, he just wandered around the city, hoping that he wouldn't bump into anyone who recognized him.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Although Sora tried to forget her conversation with Tai, it just wouldn't get out of her head. Tai's words were haunting her, and she knew that he was right; she didn't know anything. She had never been mistreated like he was being, she had never even been scolded all *that* much by her mother, so she had no idea what he was going through. But she couldn't help but to wonder why he allowed it, why he wouldn't stop his mother. It couldn't have been because he was afraid, because Tai was the most courageous person she knew, and she knew a lot of people. So why was he letting it continue? That was a mystery to Sora, and she wanted to know the answer desperately.  
  
"Hey Sora," she looked up and watched as Kari plopped down on the bench beside her. It was lunchtime and the two girls were sitting on a bench that was far from where they usually met the others. They both wanted to make sure that the others didn't know what was going on until they found a way to help their leader.  
  
"Hey Kari. Have you thought of anything yet?" Kari shook her head and the digidestined of Love lowered her head, "I haven't either. I tried talking to him today, and the only thing that it did was make him leave. He did say something to me though, so I guess it was better than nothing." Kari lightened up a bit once she heard that her brother had actually said something.  
  
"What'd he say? It could help, knowing what he was thinking about," Sora smiled a bit at the hope that had crept into Kari's voice. It was strange how just one sentence could give somebody hope, no matter how hopeless the situation. And the youngest was always the first to regain their hope.  
  
"He said 'You don't know anything. Just leave me alone. Stay out of my business.' Those were his exact words. He said it so quietly that I hardly heard him, but at least he said *something.* I just wish that it could help us to help him," Sora could still hear his voice in her head, saying the words that refused to move out of her head, "Kari, short of going and telling your father what is going on, I can't think of anything else that we can do! I tried talking to Tai, and that didn't work, and I can't think of anything else that could work. Telling your father what we know is the only thing that I can think of that will work."  
  
"We have to try talking to Tai one last time. Maybe. maybe if we talk to him after school, before my mother gets home." Kari was cut of by Sora.  
  
"No, we can't go after school. I remember hearing yesterday that your mother lost her job, so she'll probably be home. When Tai left, he wouldn't have gone home because of his mother. We're going tohavetoleaveschoolnowtofindhimbeforeheheadshome. Let'sgo!" Kari was confused for a second as Sora accelerated her speech, but she understood when Sora grabbed her arm and pulled her. They quickly got their stuff and left through the school gates, determined to find Tai.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Tai himself was wondering around the streets of the city, thinking about his life. He was startled when he felt a warm hand on his shoulder.  
  
"Tai, what are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be at school?" it was his father, probably on his lunch break. Tai just kept his face emotionless and didn't answer. His father drew him aside and they sat down on a nearby bench. He gasped when he saw Tai's black eye.  
  
"Where did that black eye come from? Have you been in a fight?" Again he was met by that emotionless expression, and he sighed in defeat. If Tai didn't want to talk, then he wouldn't push him, "I'm going to have to phone your mother and tell her that you're not at school." This actually gave him a reaction. A look of fear crossed Tai's face, but it was an extremely quick flash, and Mr. Kamiya thought that he had imagined it at first.  
  
"Please don't tell her. She's not having a very good week at the moment, so it would just worry her more than necessary," Mr. Kamiya could hardly believe it when he heard his son's voice, which was serious and quiet. His face was still expressionless, as was his voice, but his father realized that he hadn't imagined the look of fear on Tai's face before. It had been there, but he could not figure out a reason.  
  
"I'm going to have to tell her Tai! She has to know what's going on, and it's important that you go to school. I'll have to tell her, unless you can tell me a good reason why I shouldn't," Tai thought about what his father was saying. Should he tell him the truth, or ignore the beating that he would get once he got home? "I'm waiting for your reply Tai. I'll give you 5 minutes." They were then distracted by the sight of Kari and Sora running towards them.  
  
"Dad, Tai!" Kari called, worry written on her young face. Sora was also worried, but she refused to let it show. She and Kari hurried to the bench on which the two males were seated.  
  
"Kari? Sora? What are you two doing here? Shouldn't you be at school?" Mr. Kamiya was amazed that he now had three children away from school, two of them his own kids.  
  
"Well, we were worried about Tai. He just left school suddenly after I said something. and he didn't come back. So we came looking for him. We should be at school, but we judged this to be more important," Sora spoke quickly, hoping to persuade Mr. Kamiya to let them talk to Tai. The older man sighed in defeat.  
  
"Well, since I'm on a lunch break, I'll take you all out to lunch, but you had better explain what is going on," he gave in, knowing that the youngsters had a better argument than he did. The two girls smiled, and Tai just kept on staring ahead with his usual expressionless face. Inside he was relieved though, as his father wasn't going to call his mother straight away. But he also knew that the two girls were going to prosecute him almost, to try and get him to admit that he was being abused, and try to get him to talk. He was not looking forward to this lunch thing.  
  
They went into a nearby café, with Tai trailing behind the others. They sat at a table in the corner and Mr. Kamiya face the two girls.  
  
"Now, what's all this about? I don't really understand," Sora took a deep breath before answering.  
  
"Well, yesterday I went to see Tai, to try and get him to rejoin the soccer team. I mean, it is obvious that he still loves soccer, so I wanted to try and get him back for the tournament. I ran the whole way there, so I leant my head against the door and I found that I could hear everything that was going on in the apartment." Sora trailed off as she remembered what she had heard. Tai was still just staring ahead, but there was some emotion in his eyes, an expression of someone painfully recalling the past.  
  
"Yes, and? What was important about that?" Mr. Kamiya spoke softly, wondering where the conversation was heading. He had a bad feeling about it, and he didn't like the feeling.  
  
"I-I could hear Tai's mother abusing him. Saying really awful things that weren't true and I could hear things that sounded like somebody was punching somebody else. But the worst part of it was that it sounded as though it was a regular occurrence," Sora looked at Tai, who was now staring at his hands. Mr. Kamiya was looking shocked, as though he couldn't believe what she was saying. Kari just sat next to Sora, keeping calm but with a sad look in her eyes.  
  
"Tai, is what Sora said true?" Mr. Kamiya could hardly force the words out. His son was being abused by the person that he himself had once loved. He could remember her looking after the children lovingly, but then again, she had been extremely hard on Tai sometimes, whilst she had never yelled at Kari. He watched Tai carefully as Tai battled with himself as to how to answer his father.  
  
'What should I do? Should I just lie and say no, or tell the truth and actually have a chance at happiness? But what about Kari? Will she be crushed once she realized that her mother was not someone that she should look up to? Oh, I don't know. Why did they have to come and say this in front of dad? Why couldn't they wait until I was alone? Or better yet, why couldn't they just leave me alone?' Tai's thoughts were spinning around and around in circles, until his mind was a jumble.  
  
"Tai, just tell the truth! I promise that I'll believe you this time! I-I don't want you to have to keep on lying to everyone, and be so miserable. Please tell us the truth!" Tai looked up at his little sister's words, and their eyes met. Kari saw a flash of pain and confusion in her brother's eyes, but then he was too good at controlling his emotions and they went emotionless again. Kari hoped that by telling him that he would tell the truth quickly, so they could figure out what they could do. But Tai still battled with himself for another few minutes, before finally making up his mind.  
  
"I-it's true," Tai looked back down and examined his hands, not really wanting to say anymore. Mr. Kamiya sat back in his chair, worry written all over his face.  
  
"How long has it been happening?" he asked quietly after a moment. Sora and Kari both looked at Tai, who was looking very uncomfortable.  
  
"3 years," was the whispered reply. Tai didn't want to answer the questions that were being thrown at him, but he knew that he had to. He knew that the only way he could stop the nightmare that he was living.  
  
"Your mother made you quit soccer, didn't she?" Sora asked softly, knowing that he would reply with a 'yes.' Tai nodded, wishing that he was far away from where he was.  
  
"Do you know why she did it? She must have a reason," Tai was extremely uncomfortable at this question, especially as Kari was sitting across from him at the table.  
  
"S-she was upset when she heard that Kari wasn't going to be living with her. She blamed me for bringing her bad luck whenever anything went wrong, and said that Kari would bring her good luck, not bad luck," that was the longest sentence that Tai had said the whole day and he knew that it made both Kari and his father uncomfortable. He wanted to leave and he tightened his grip on the strap of his bag. He looked up and saw the sad and worried expressions on the faces of three of the most important people in his life. He had to leave. He quickly stood up and left, dragging his bag after him.  
  
"I'll go after him and I'll bring him back here," Sora grabbed her bag too and rushed after Tai, her thoughts coming into place. She had wondered why she had always felt special whenever she was around Tai, and now she had finally puzzled it out. She had fallen for him. It had taken her a while to realize it, but Sora Takenouchi had fallen in love with her best friend. And now she had to tell him.  
  
* * * * * * * * * * * *  
  
Tai ran once he was a distance away from the café. He was so confused and he hated making the people he loved sad or worried. And he had gone and done both. It didn't matter that he was living a life full of misery, as long as everyone else was happy. That was what he had tried to believe for the last 3 years anyway. It was his motto: 'Better me than anybody else.' It was pretty much different to many other people's mottos, but that was what he believed. Or tried to at least. Now he had gone and made everybody worry over him, and he didn't like doing that. He knew that at least one of them would be following him, and he guessed that it would be Sora. After all, she *was* the fastest runner out of them all. He knew that he didn't have much of a chance at getting away, but he ran anyway. There was a slight possibility that he would get away, but he knew that that wouldn't happen. Sora would know instinctively where to run, even though she didn't know him very well. After all, he would know where she would run to, even though they were not as close as when they were younger. So he stopped when he reached the secluded beach beside the ocean and sat down, putting his head on his knees. He didn't cry, but he didn't move either. He closed his eyes and counted down slowly from 10, knowing that by the time he had finished Sora would have found him. When he reached 0, he felt a hand on his shoulder, and felt somebody sit don next to him.  
  
"Hey Tai," was all that Sora said, before she stared out into the ocean. She knew that Tai didn't want to make anybody upset, but she also knew that he just wanted to pour out everything that had happened to him to make sure that it stopped.  
  
"Hey Sora," Tai whispered, knowing that it was pointless to stop speaking again. He only whispered it, but Sora heard him. She sighed to herself without making a sound. This was going to be harder than she had first thought, but she knew that she had to go though with it.  
  
"Tai, we all care about you and we want to make sure that you are okay. We are all worried about you, and the fastest way to make us stop worrying is to tell us what is going on so that we can make sure that there is nothing to worry about. I know that you hate making others upset, and that was probably why you didn't tell anyone before, but now that we know, we have to stop it. We won't stop worrying until you are safe and away from your mother, so it would be better for everyone if you tell us everything," she said this softly, and it came out almost as a whisper. But Tai heard it, and he knew that she was right. Sora was always right. He still didn't lift his head up, but he nodded slowly. He didn't want to go back straight away though.  
  
"I know you're right Sora, it's just. it's just so. I don't know. Ever since this began I was acting cheerful because I didn't want to make anyone upset. It was easier at first, because I made myself believe that everything was okay and that my mother was just stressed and it would all go away. But it didn't. I managed to get through each day because of all of the digidestined. you guys kept me thinking straight. And to make sure I didn't upset you guys, I just acted cheerful and happy. It worked, because nobody really saw what was going on, but I guess that I kept on wishing that you guys *would* notice. I don't really know why. I guess I'm just confused. I mean, I trusted my mother and I guess that I still believe that she'll snap out of it, any day now," he still kept his head on his knees, which muffled his words a little, but Sora understood what he was saying. Or at least she tried to. She couldn't fully understand what he had been through because she had never really been treated badly in her whole life. She knew that she wouldn't be able to say that she knew what he was going through, because he would know that she was lying, and that would push him even further away. So she just stayed silent and waited for him to continue. He paused, but he started again after a moment.  
  
"And then. then all of you guys drifted away even further. You all fell in love and started dating, and nobody really noticed that I was left behind, that I wasn't really with anybody. Joe went everywhere with Mimi, Izzy went with his girlfriend, you went with Matt, and even my little sister seemed to forget that I was there and she started going with T.K. You guys always paired up like that and it left me alone, to be by myself. I guess I just got used to it. I pretended to be happy whilst the rest of you ignored me and I just got more and more miserable each day. When my mother made me quit soccer, it was the last straw. I.I don't really know what came over me, but. I mean, I have the crest of courage, and I started acting like a coward. I talked to Kari in the hospital, after she told me that to her I was more important than my parents, but she just got angry after I told her. She didn't want to believe. That was when I decided that I was going to get into even more trouble if I didn't keep my mouth shut, so I didn't speak to anyone. Well, whilst you were leaving the room I said something, but you didn't hear me. I can't remember what I said. Then. life went on as it had for the past few years I suppose, except that I didn't bother to try and act cheerful all the time. I would arrive at our usual meeting place before everyone else and I climbed the tallest tree there. I would usually listen to what all of you were doing. That was how my paper dropped, and you found it. Then. well, you know what happened after that. And that is the story of my depressing life," Tai still kept his head down, even after he had finished speaking. Sora was feeling guilty, after all, if she had just acted on her suspicion that everything was not right with him, and then Tai would have been fine.  
  
"I'm sorry Tai. I-I didn't do my job as a best friend properly. I got so hung up over Matt, that I forgot about my friends and I became a bit of a bitch. But that's going to change. Matt and I have broken up, we realised that we didn't really love each other, we were just ignoring things. Well, I was at least. I-I know that this is probably not the best time to say this, but... Tai, I-I've realised that I-I lo-love you," Sora turned bright red as a blush rose in her cheeks. She was looking at the ground, as a lot of people do when they are uncertain about what reaction they are going to get. Tai was extremely surprised. He lifted his head from his knees and looked at Sora with an expression that Sora could not read.  
  
"Sora, I-I have loved you since summer camp, just before we went to the digital world. I uh, I just didn't really get the chance to tell you," Tai had turned red too, and Sora almost laughed until she realised that she was blushing too. She realised that they were getting closer and closer, and before she knew it they were locked in a passionate kiss, a kiss that told each other of their feelings.  
  
"Finally things are staring to go right," Tai thought to himself as they broke off the kiss.  
  
"We should go back to Kari and your father now," Sora suggested, and he nodded. They walked back to the café slowly, enjoying their time together...  
  
EPILOGUE  
  
Mrs. Kamiya was arrested by the police for abusing Tai and she was sent to prison for 5 years. Kari and T.K married when they were 19 and they had three children; Alex, Sarah and Laura. T.K became an author, writing about their experiences in the digital world. Kari became a kindergarten teacher and loved working with the kids she taught. Kari and Tai made up and Kari made sure that she kept in touch with her brother after he moved out. Matt married Jun, a girl who had moved into his Maths class just before he and Sora had broken up. They had a son, Simon, who was 3 years older than Kari's first child Alex. Matt became a famous singer and his band was world famous. Joe became the most famous surgeon in the world, after graduating from the top medical school. He married Mimi, who became a model, and they had the twins Penny and Daniel, the eldest out of all of the digi- destined's children. Izzy married Meredith, the girl he had been dating since he was 14, after becoming a new Bill Gates. Meredith helped him run his company, and they had a daughter, Steph.  
  
Tai had rejoined the soccer team and they had won their tournament, and scouts had seen his talent. He and Kari repaired the gap that had been between them, and they were exceptionally close. He had moved back with his father and Kari, and they lived peacefully together. Tai and Sora continued to date all throughout high school and whilst Sora went to university. Sora became a physio-therapist whilst Tai became a world-champion soccer player, known for his determination to win. They traveled together whilst Tai was playing all around the world, before getting married when they were 23. They settled down back in Odaiba after they married. Tai quit soccer and got a job as a diplomat to the digital world. Together Tai and Sora had two sons and a daughter, Eriol, Syaoran and Tamika. Altogether all of the digidestined lived happy lives after Tai's tragedy ended, and the world was at peace. Even though the world seems to be a bad place and that everything is against you, remember that everything can change in a second, as long as you trust someone.  
  
THE END  
  
Well, my one-shot fic turned into a three part fic. The ending is *very* lame, but I'm not very good with romance or with endings. Most of the time my characters die when I finish a fic, but I'm trying to stop that. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed my first Digimon fic and I'm surprised that I finished it!! Anyway, please review, it took me forever to write this! It was in my head, but I tend to write things way quicker in my mind than I can type it. If anyone knows how to make italics work, could you please tell me by either e-mail or in your review please? Because I really need to know how to do it!! Thank you! Anyway, I'll stop my babbling now and let you get on with whatever you are doing. Please review! 


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